Colonel Cator's Grooming Regimen Lesson #11: Talcum Powder

This week, our expert teaches us how to reduce body funk by using talcum powder.

Last session, our in-house grooming specialist, Colonel Cator Sparks, gave us tips to on skin care. In today's lesson, he teaches us how to reduce body funk by using talcum powder.

I know it sounds like something gramps uses, but Talcum Powder can be a lifesaver year-round for keeping sweat and stank to a minimum.

What exactly is talc? It’s an extremely soft mineral used for absorbing moisture. It's often used on babies since they can’t dry themselves, but it's also used on cracks in hardwood floors to prevent squeaks.

Talcum powder helps with anti-chafing and anti-wetness in the groin, in shoes, and between the cheeks. It’s also good for men on the furrier side to use all over their body since sweat/stank can build in hairy places. But please don’t go the baby powder route! We are men and don’t need to remind women of diapers and breast-feeding.

Below are a variety of powders that are made with men in mind. Give a good sprinkle before sports, a hot date, or a wild night on the dance floor.

NOTE: Always powder while buck-naked. You don’t want to shake into your shorts and cover your shoes. Also, don’t use an excessive amount of powder—I’m still in therapy for the time I went to the doctor and he had to feel around down there and a bomb of powder filled the room.

  • It’s all in the name! Balla Powder is for exactly what it says. With its fragrance free ‘tingle’ formula, it not only keeps you dry down there, but also gives your day a little kick-start. (Retail $15)
  • I found Matte for Men at Sephora and it isn’t as talcy as others since it is made with cornstarch, aloe, and baking soda. (Retail $28)
  • I personally enjoy smelling a bit gramp-ish sometimes and Geo Trumper’s Talcum Powder has been the one used by English gentleman for decades. (Retail $16)
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