Nick Offerman Used A Boner Analogy To Explain Why He Isn't Worried About "Parks & Rec's" Fate At NBC

Ron Effing Swanson.

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Complex Original

Image via Complex Original

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Parks and Recreation is currently absent from the NBC programming schedule, again, but Ron Swanson isn't worried so you shouldn't be either. While talking with The Hollywood Reporter, Nick Offerman explained why he isn't sweating the show's current status, and in true Offerman fashion, it was weird and hilarious—he described Parks as the "throbbing, turgid boner of NBC."  Read the excerpt below: 

The Internet had a heart attack a couple weeks ago when Parks & Rec was pulled from the NBC schedule. Any thoughts? 
We don't really bat an eyelash. It's not the first time, nor the second, that we've been shuffled around by the network. We want the best for the network. They are a larger organism of which we're a living breathing part. I dare say we are the throbbing, turgid boner of NBC. Perhaps, more appropriately, we're also the second ovaries since our show is a matriarchy under Amy [Poehler]. But like any organism, sometimes you're proud of your genitals, and you want to use them to give pleasure to others. And other times you have to focus on the other parts of your body -- if you have a bad tooth or an ear infection. In those instances, you don't generally want your genitalia exposed. And so you put it away while you pay attention to your haircut. If you're getting your lips or ears pierced, you don't want your genitalia stealing the thunder.

Genitalia shouldn't have any place in piercing. 
Yes. We enjoy the cultural coitus into which NBC inserts us, but sometimes we understand that we will remain dormant within their trousers. As long as the lights are still on and we're still shooting, we're happy as clams. We just shot our 100th episode, which is 94 more than we thought we were going to go.

So there you have it. NBC will unleash Parks from their pants and back into the cultural coitus in which it belongs when it's ready. Don't fear for the one-eyed monster.

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[via THR]

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