"Teen Mom's" Reason of the Week to Always Wear a Condom (Sept. 23, 2013)

Also: Josh still doesn't talk.

This week on Teen Mom 3—like every week on Teen Mom 3—tensions ran high between the young mothers and the fathers of their children. Though their stories are all different in content, they are similar in theme: When one tries to start a family so young, issues like irresponsibility, finances, and possibly even drugs will drive a wedge into their plans. Also, Josh still refuses to say more than a few words on camera even when he's spoken to, so not much has changed since last week. It's nice to know some things will always stay consistent.

Mackenzie

This week, Mackenzie is dealing with the fact that Josh wants to go back into rodeoing, even though the pay is meager and the sport is dangerous. She wants to be a supportive girlfriend but is finding it difficult to remain strong when she figures out that raising Gannon is expensive, and there's only so much money she can make from working part-time after school. Josh, since he's already graduated, has all the time in the world to work full-time—but with his focus on training for bronco riding, he has no income. Mackenzie worries that they won't be able to support themselves and Gannon if more money doesn't start coming in.

Mackenzie's fears for their financial future are only exacerbated when she takes Gannon with her to cheer practice and starts talking to her coach. He tells her that he believes she has the ability to cheer at Oklahoma state if she pushes herself hard enough, but she's going to have to start working harder if she wants to do that, and pay for school at the same time. Mackenzie says that's where Josh comes in to support them with rodeo, and her cheer coach—along with EVERYONE ELSE WATCHING THIS DAMN SHOW—scoffs. How can Josh support them with rodeoing, if he only makes money off of that when he wins? Mackenzie looks conflicted, because apparently she hasn't thought of that little scenario before.

Later, Mackenzie, Gannon, and the family head off to the rodeo to see Josh compete for the first time since his accident. Except they go the wrong way, and end up missing the whole thing while Mackenzie whines in the backseat about how she's going to start crying because they missed the whole thing. 

Josh doesn't seem to mind that much, though—but it's hard to tell because he STILL doesn't seem to have the ability to emote or speak on camera. Does he even have thoughts? Ugh. Mackenzie's mom asks Josh if he won any money, and he says no, much to Mackenzie's disappointment. They literally have no money.

Later, Mackenzie has a talk with Josh about their financial future, and asks him if he could get a side job alongside rodeoing, because it's clear they won't be able to support themselves off just money he MIGHT win from competing. Josh tells her that it's possible to make a career out of something like this, but Mackenzie stands her ground: She wants a nice wedding and a nice house, and Gannon isn't cheap either. They agree to stick together in the end, and everything is a-OK. For now.

Katie

Katie and Joey had probably their worst episode yet this week, as they spent the majority of it fighting about the same hot-button issue that people in this country argue about every day: Marijuana. Katie believes it's a drug, and is angry that Josh spent about $79 dollars on weed when they only had $80 in their account. She asks him why he only left her one dollar for groceries, which is actually kind of a valid question. Joey, of course, gets defensive, and they spend most of the episode not talking, or fighting about whether or not marijuana is actually a drug or not. Katie firmly believes that Joey is a drug addict.

Later, while the couple is in therapy, we find out that Katie is to adamant about marijuana because her own father was arrested for drugs when she was 12. No matter that he was arrested for meth, and that's pretty different than marijuana—to her, a drug is a drug.

She tells Joey in front of the counselor that if he doesn't stop smoking weed, it could be the breaking point of their relationship. Now, this gets Joey's attention, and he agrees to stop smoking if it'll save their family. The two end the episode with a kiss, and it seems all is fine...UNTIL NEXT WEEK (insert evil MTV laugh). 

Alex

Alex wasn't featured in this episode as much as previous week's, so there's not much to report here. Apparently, Matt left her mother's basement a complete mess when they kicked him out of their house, so Alex calls Matt to tell him that he needs to come and clean it all up, as well as get all of the clothes he left there. Matt agrees to come over after he eats—he says he'll come over "whenever," because he's an asshole—and Alex seems partially satisfied with that answer.

When Matt does come over, he cleans a little, then asks to see Arabella. Alex, of course, refuses him, which makes Matt mad and prompts him to leave without getting everything he owns. I'm not sure why Alex cared so much about making him take all of his things when it's not that hard to just donate his leftover clothes, but for some reason this thought doesn't cross her mind and she chases after Matt as he flees to his friend's car and they drive off.

Later, Alex reveals that she's filing for sole custody, and only wants Matt to be able to see Arabella through supervised visits. She seems to have the upper hand here because she's the one who isn't a drug addict, has a home, and hasn't been to jail, but Matt goes to see someone to talk about his options when it comes to custody anyway. He reveals that he's homeless, and is referred to a shelter where he can get back on his feet where he's to stay sober and get a job before he can apply for visitation rights.

Alex ends the episode smiling for once.

Briana

For Briana, the drama between her and Nova's dad, Devoin, hit a fever pitch this week. Devoin hasn't been acting like a responsible father recently, and Briana decides she's sick of it—she's given him a chance to prove himself, and he hasn't, so she doesn't want him around anymore. She reveals to her mother than she's going to tell Devoin that he's not welcome in their lives anymore, and Briana's mom is supportive: She tells her that she did the same thing with Briana's father, but that it's a huge decision and Briana needs to be sure. Briana says she is.

Later, Briana invites Devoin over so that she can break the news to him. Briana's mother goes upstairs with Nova while the two talk, and Briana tells Devoin that he's not responsible, he doesn't help with Nova, and that she doesn't want him around her or Nova. Devoin gets angry, and tells her that Nova can't grow up without a father, but Briana retorts that she herself did, and she's fine.

Now, it's at this point that shit gets real: Apparently angered by Devoin's statement that Nova can't grow up without a father, Briana's mother storms down the stairs with Nova and yells at Devoin that she's sick of him, and to get out of their lives. She even hands Nova off to Briana so she can use her hands to yell at him and physically push him out of the house. They nearly get into a fight, but Devoin eventually leaves when Briana's mom pushes him out of the door and slams it behind him like a BAD. ASS. BITCH.

Finally, a mother on this show who isn't completely and totally annoying!

After the explosive meeting with Devoin, Briana reveals that she's going to renew the order of protection against Devoin, but is scared that Devoin might get physically angry if they serve him with it themselves. So, they call the police to serve Devoin with the papers, and sit outside his house in their car while he's told that he needs to stay away from the family for the next three weeks until a court date, at which time a judge will either approve or deny their restraining order. Moments after he's served, Briana checks Devoin's Twitter on her phone, and sees that he tweeted "I'M A FREE MAN !" after the cops left. She's annoyed, but glad that he's out of their lives for now.

Teen Mom's reason of the week to wear a condom

Use a condom, and you won't have to deal with being forever attached to your shitty ex, whose thought process goes: "court order of protection from the mother of my child...better log on TWITTER," or who thinks bronco riding is a suitable way to earn a living better than living in a cardboard box on the street. You deserve better. Go buy some Trojans.

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