Study: These Types of People Are Having the Best Sex

A series of studies explores the difference between "obsessive" and "harmonious" sexual passion.

Angry couple.
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Angry couple.

Angry couple.

Are you obsessed with sex? Then you’re probably unsatisfied with it.

According to a series of studies conducted by Frédérick Philippe, Robert Vallerand, and colleagues, individuals who demonstrated “obsessive sexual passion” struggled to integrate their sexual desires into other areas of their lives. Because of this, they had a tendency to detach themselves from their sexuality and typically approached sex as a goal or a task they need to complete. The obsessive mindset was shown to significantly affect the enjoyment of sex, and ultimately left these individuals unsatisfied after getting it on.

So if we want good sex we have to abandon passion? Not at all. The studies, reported by Scientific American, concluded that passion is a key factor in sexual satisfaction; however, you shouldn’t take an obsessive approach—you should take a harmonious one.

Here’s what that jargon means: Those people with harmonious sexual passion have no trouble integrating their sexuality into other parts of their lives—unlike those with obsessive sexual passion. People with the former form of passion were less likely to have relationship conflicts and rarely viewed sex as being in conflict with other activities or goals. The study also found harmonious sexual passion led to more control over sexual drive, fewer sexually intrusive thoughts, and the ability “to fully engage and enjoy sexual activity in an open, spontaneous, and nondefensive manner.”

Obsessive sexual passion, on the other hand, was associated with violent reactions to romantic rejection, an interest in alternative partners, and temporary relationships.

So, lesson learned? If you want to enjoy sex more, stop obsessing over it. 

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