Victorian Liberals Sexist Memoir Sparks Criticism

Nigel Gohl, a Victorian Liberal, has sparked controversy after details regarding his 2005 sex-book have resurfaced.

Nigel Gohl
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Nigel Gohl

Nigel Gohl, a Melbourne mortgage broker who was running for one of the city's most left-wing seats as a Liberal has been forced to call it quits after the contents of his 2005 book have resurfaced.

In 2005, Gohl penned ‘Around the World in 80 Babes’, detailing his days of pursuing women around the world. The book is so much more sexist than you could possibly imagine, and it has, of course, raised concerns about the Liberal Party’s vetting process, if it even exists. Gohl was forced to pull-out (no pun intended) of the race today, after the criticism became too much. 

Around the World in 80 Babes by Nigel Gohl

The description of the masturbatory manifesto details how “chicks, babes, women and nudity” were prominent in Gohl’s life. He boasts of bringing a woman to her third orgasm during “an intense forty minute session” (we call bullshit). But the book also explores the deep emotional douchebag conflict occurring within douchebag Nigel Golh’s douchebag brain. For example, regarding one poor female victim, he laments that “while I loved pounding her athletic body” he was “bored to tears with her desires to spend Saturday AND Sunday mornings going for walks and picnics”. Poor Mr Gohl, like so many other men, has been constantly messed around by women's selfish, narcissistic desires to have their own individual hobbies and interests besides pleasuring him.

The book continues to detail Golh’s self-proclaimed “excellent bonking” sessions. He offers advice throughout, detailing how “the quicker you can get the first date out of the way and the time needed for a girl to feel comfortable with you, the quicker you start getting laid.” Indeed, we would also agree that a girl feeling comfortable is probably a good thing to tick off before you get some pork on your fork. Yet given the personality of Gohl that is illustrated in the book, we find it hard to believe that has ever occurred.

The book is relatively old, being published way back in 2005 at a time where primary school kids were still using the word “gay” as an insult and Rolf Harris was still being taught in songbooks. Yet several party members have still raised concerns about the way the book depicts women. No Shit, as the book is such a poorly written collection of sexism and fragile ego that it makes Tony Abbott winking look like a Clem Ford article.

The liberals are keen to regain Prahran after losing the seat in 2014. The electorate has high numbers of progressive young people, LGBTI residents and families. Somehow, we feel as though Gohl talking at rallies about his “excellent bonking sessions” may not be the best strategy.

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